me catching some gnarly waves
i’m not mad that you passed up the opportunity to say surfing the web i’m just disappointed
"ARE WE REALLY HITTING ON EACH OTHER RIGHT NOW OR ARE WE KIDDING?!!" The Musical.
waking up cold: alright I need more blankies
waking up hot: covers thrown everywhere. sweat behind the kneecaps. 3 dead. the pillow is the sun. critical condition.
this speaks to me
for every popular text post you reblog there is a crying blogger on the other side drowning in notifications
DON’T YOU DARE
you know you secretly like it
I came out as a queer during football practice when my coach was like “son, you’re having trouble throwing straight” and I replied “I’m also having trouble being straight”. It got very quiet and then coach just shook his head and said “throw the damn ball, Cooper”
i have been laughing for 3 million years
It’s so fucking weird how girls can just tell when our periods start. Like the exact fucking moment. You’re just sitting in bed or standing in line for groceries and your face does that thing kind of like in That’s so Raven when Raven gets a vision
Real life: most common eye color is brown
Literature: eye color is anything but brown
Hello, Police? I accidentally stepped on my cats foot and need to be arrested
i can’t even appreciate the beauty of the sunrise after staying up all night because it’s just like. fuck. there it is. there’s the sun. i fucked up. why am i laughing. nothing is funny. the sun is there and it’s harshly reprimanding me for being awake all night. “this is the life you’ve chosen for yourself fucker” it says. i’m not laughing. i’m crying. there’s the fucking sun
Throwback Thursday - January 2013, Panda cub Xiao Liwu makes his public debut.
You Aren’t Boring I Just Suck At Conversations I’m Sorry: a novel by me
I’m Not Ignoring You I Just Don’t Know What To Say: a sequel by me
I Feel Like I have Nothing Interesting To Say So I Don’t Say Anything At All And I’m Really Sorry Don’t Stop Talking To Me: the trilogy.
By Fall Out Boy
Why is it such a hard concept to grasp that cows milk is for baby cows and not humans
why is it such a hard concept to grasp that soy milk is for baby soybeans and not humans
why is it such a hard concept to grasp that trix are for kids and not rabbits